Thursday, June 13, 2013

I can drive again!

I had my 6 week post-op appointment with Dr. Roh today, and it was all good news! I am now officially allowed to drive, swim, do low-impact cardio, wear heels, and sleep on my stomach. (Those things might not sound like a big deal, but they are!) 

It was funny because when Dr. Roh saw that my tattoo was just slightly crooked he got all mad at himself and was like "Aww, come on! Your crown! I thought we had it!" And he called his assistant in and he was like "Matt, look at this, it's off by like a millimeter! Man..." Apparently they have a lot of fun piecing together people's tattoos so when they end up crooked they are very disappointed with themselves. Haha. But he said as soon as my incision fades to back to my skin tone that means it is fully healed and I can get my tattoo touched up. So, no big deal. 

Still don't know when I'll be back to work yet. My next appointment isn't until August 8th, so I'm assuming that's when I'll get the go-ahead to go back to work. 

Anyway, without further ado, I got my new xrays! As you can see, I am part robot. I found out I am also apparently part zombie, because they used cadaver bone for my fusion. Gross.


My kyphosis is down to 65°. Not back to normal range, but he said my spine was really stiff during surgery so that's the best they could do. Oh well, it's better than 87°, and at least I know that it can't get any worse now. And my scoliosis is pretty much non-existant, yay! My official height is 5'6.5", so I gained an inch. And the weight keeps falling off... I'm down to 128 lbs. Before surgery I was close to 140.

All in all I am feeling pretty good. I am glad I am allowed to do more things now, and Dr. Roh said in a couple months the muscle soreness will go away and I'll be feeling a lot more back to normal. I got a prescription for physical therapy, so I will be starting that as soon as I call and set it up. That'll give me something to do. Should help get me moving again and strengthen my back and core muscles.

Things are looking up. Just gotta find ways to kill my boredom now!

Bent but not broken,
Robin

Friday, June 7, 2013

Withdrawal


Its been a couple weeks since I've posted. I am 5 weeks post op now. Time is a blur. Day after day of doing nothing. My life seems to have no purpose right now. Most of my day is spent wishing it were bedtime so I could just get into bed and sleep away the boredom. I hate recovery.

Most of this talk is probably spurred by my withdrawal symptoms. I finished my Percocet a couple days ago and had to switch to the Norco. Turns out emotionally I am having some pretty killer withdrawal. Physically I am okay. I may have a little nausea here and there, but mostly what I'm battling is anxiety attacks and depression. I am naturally an emotional person, so having all this extra on top of my regular rollercoaster of emotions is a bit much. It's not a good feeling to not be in control of what's going on inside your head. I know I have no reason to be sad or upset right now. I am comfortable at home with my dog and my fiance and I am recovering from a serious surgery. There is no shame in that. And yet I kind of feel like Rapunzel. I'm trapped in my little tower and I'm being prevented from seeing and doing so much. It may sound sad but I don't remember what it's like to feel occupied and happy. Even though I try to visit family and have friends over and stuff... Ugh.

I don't know what I'm saying. Jon is out getting me a movie so I can have something to occupy my time. I'm just so bored, I feel like my brain is melting out my ears. I hate this. I have no more joy or spirit. This surgery has officially sucked everything out of me.

Bent (and feeling kinda broken),
Robin