photo from Tumblr
I. AM SO. FREAKING. RESTLESS. I don't know what to do with myself lately. I don't feel well enough to actually DO things like crafts or coloring or even reading magazines or watching movies. All I do is lay around and then get on the computer for awhile. Then lay around for some more and get on the computer again. It's so frustrating. Deep down inside me I know better days are coming soon. I can feel it. I can feel it when I pass the time to take my painkillers by like an hour at a time without noticing. I can feel it when I am taking a shower, that I know I would not have been able to do these things last week or the week before. Recovery is so slow you hardly even notice it. I have lost most of my steri-strips now. All that's left are the ones on the far bottom of my spine where my drainage tube was inserted. My scabs are starting to come off. Everything is really looking how it should. So how do I know if I am feeling how I should? It's frustrating. I want to feel better. I want to do things. I want to have energy and life again.
Someday soon these things will come. Right?
Right. That's what I'll keep telling myself.
Bent but not broken,